ETC: Enable Trust-Building Conditions
“You cannot sow suspicion and reap trust”
For the last one month in our teen mentorship classes across selected secondary schools in #Upper Sokponba area, Benin City, Edo state, we have been talking about ‘#ETC’. We have used the common #etcetera acronym to share useful personal growth tips with these students.
With the high level of suspicion and mistrust in society today, I think adults need to also understand the essence of trust in our daily lives. Hence the need to share this topic with the general public.
We live in a world where trust has become a luxury a handful of people can afford. Stephen Covey, in his book, “The #Speed of Trust”, expatiated in details how mistrust makes otherwise easy processes cumbersome. In some cases, the lack of trust can completely hamper the progress of a group.
Great opportunities are allowed to pass by because of a lack of trust. Ideas that would have blossomed into something great is slaughtered on the altar of scepticism and suspicion. When you have reservations over a process, instead of throwing the baby with the bathwater, you should learn to build defences that will make the idea fly while short-circuiting the possibility of it being abused.
For instance, in December 2017, the #Welfare Director of the Students Union Government of my Alma Mater, reached me via phone, requesting that I help see an idea to fruition. The idea was to help raise funds for #indigent students. I had my reservations, and I explained it to him without making it look as if I was labelling him a scam.
“The idea is great and noble, but the Students’ Union doesn’t enjoy a good record with public funds, and getting people to donate to the union purse for this course, no matter how novel, would be a herculean task”, I told him politely.
“But if your intention is altruistic, I will help you drive the idea. You won’t make money, but you will make a name for yourself. So if you are interested in the good name, I am with you, but if money is your goal, then I will be against you”. I made it clear to him.
Today that idea is on course for the third year running, and it has touched the lives of over a hundred students and counting. And yes, he also got an award of #excellence and $recognition from the school #management.
I could have dismissed him immediately he approached me, with my mistrust for the Students Union leaders as a ‘justifiable reason’. And that would not have brought succour to the students who today, have benefited from the scheme.
When an idea comes up, be it business, community service, or whatever, the first test to decide if it will get your participation or support should be the essence of the idea.
What does it hope to achieve?
Is it for a greater good?
Is it worth my time or investment?
If it scales through this test, before the issue of trust will be dealt with.
Mistrust can easily be handled in most cases by putting up check and balances in place. Killing an idea despite the benefits simply because you don’t trust the executioner is not progressive. The world would not move an inch if everyone acts that way.
You don’t have to rub it on the face of everyone that you don’t trust them.
If you can’t trust others, who then will trust you?
Be flexible! Create an environment where trust and mutual understanding can thrive!
You can’t succeed in isolation.
We all need each other!
A & B Coach.
NB: The attached picture is that of my classmates at the University.
We have stayed together as one big family because of the mutual trust we have for each other!
IDEDE Oseyande, a graduate of the Federal University of Technology, Akure, is an unrepentant believer in the Nigeria project.
His concern for the actualisation of a prosperous nation and the continent, in general, is reflected in his written works.
He currently runs an online advocacy platform (www.socialwatchdog.ng) where he engages the government and the people.
Among his published works are ‘What is Left of What is Right?’, ‘The Portrait of a Revolutionary Leader’ and ‘Warri No Dey Carry Last’.
He is a guest writer for several blogs and his Attitudinal and Behavioral Coaching classes has transformed many lives.