Opinion

Different Shades Of Ingratitude.

Written by Idede Oseyande

Different Shades of Ingratitude

“Are there not ten that were cleansed, where are the other nine?” ~ Jesus Christ

The above statement was made by Jesus Christ during his earthly #ministry after he cleansed ten lepers, but only one came back to thank him for the kind gesture. This tells that #ungratefulness had been a trait in humans from time immemorial.

Ungrateful people are everywhere, that’s not news. But there is a subtle shade of #thanklessness that most people are guilty of, consciously or by omission.

In my undergraduate days at the university, a friend of mine was fond of complaining about a particular uncle of his, who will always call his parents to inform them that he had given their son a token.
“Why will he always tell them that he gave me something? Have I not appreciated him already?”, was the foundation of his argument.

Don’t bother to pass judgment, just hear the full list.

Do you know that my friend would #never on his own #tell his parents that his uncle gave him something?
Do you think he would not have told his parents that the uncle is #stingy assuming the man never gave him anything?
I presume my friend was not comfortable with it because he feared that his parents might begin to consider his uncle’s gifts in their monthly #allowance to him, and he did not want that to happen.

But then, what about the uncle. What was the #intention of always finding a way to tell his elder brother that he saw his nephew and he gave him some cash?
I did not quite get it clearly at that time, but now I do.

Have you ever been accused of being #self-centred by friends or relatives of people you have helped #tremendously? Oh, mine!
If you have, I am sure you know how it #hurts.

They look you in the face and ask you, “who you #epp?” And those you have helped that were supposed to have informed them of your #benevolence will be there, with lips sealed!
It can be traumatic especially when you went out of your way, making every human and legal #sacrifice to help them.

Why would you oblige anyone who cares to listen or not, stories of how a friend or relative #failed to give you #assistance when you needed it, but find it difficult and unnecessary to share with them the #testimony of how you were helped?

“But I thanked him #privately and even bought him #gifts to show appreciation”, you would want to justify your actions.

“To hell with you and your privatised #appreciation”! Yes, I said that!

The most annoying ones are those who will cut out the stories of how people helped them and start tagging themselves “#self-made”.
My friend, no you are not my friend, you are an #INGRATE!
You have not only offended your #benefactor but have also #offended those who you have #blocked from accessing the generosity of that benefactor!

So many people are #suffering today looking for help around the world because some of their predecessors who benefited in time past ruined the opportunities with their #ungratefulness.

How will my #thankfulness help the man that is already rich?
That’s where you miss it.

First of all, everyone wants to be appreciated. It is the major reason why people do good deeds. When you withhold the appreciation you have indirectly #demoralized the person from extending the goodwill to others.

Secondly, when you tell others of the assistance an individual gave you, it attracts goodwill to the person.
My people, (Edo people) used to say, “it is not complete for anyone”.
You never can tell what the person want presently or in the future, it might be the #goodwill you have attracted to him or her that will help them earn it.

If you did not shut your mouth when you were asking, you have no moral right to shut your mouth after you have received!

It pays to be grateful for the kindness shown to us!

To all the grateful hearts out there!👍🏾🍷

IDEDE Oseyande
A & B Coach

About the author

Idede Oseyande

IDEDE Oseyande, a graduate of the Federal University of Technology, Akure, is an unrepentant believer in the Nigeria project.
His concern for the actualisation of a prosperous nation and the continent, in general, is reflected in his written works.

He currently runs an online advocacy platform (www.socialwatchdog.ng) where he engages the government and the people.

Among his published works are 'What is Left of What is Right?', 'The Portrait of a Revolutionary Leader' and 'Warri No Dey Carry Last'.

He is a guest writer for several blogs and his Attitudinal and Behavioral Coaching classes has transformed many lives.

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